Buddhists have a saying…whatever befalls you do not succumb to it.
Have you noticed that when you stub your toe or injure a part of your body all your focus and attention go to that injury? However, most injuries and illnesses are usually transitory – we get better and move on.
But things stand still when hearing news like “You have Cancer” for the first time. Just a few minutes prior, you were this normal person, then suddenly you become the disease.
Illness and disease are unavoidable elements in the human condition. But when we fixate on an illness, and the accompanying pain, it can take over our lives.
When we suffer – however serious it is – our ailment is only a part of who and what we are. If we allow it to become who we are by weaving it into our identity, it is much harder to deal with.
When we suffer from illness identity everyone suffers. And how we relate (think and feel) about an illness often has a big effect on its course. Attitude has been shown to be a very important factor not just in resilience and recovery from sickness, but in longevity and happiness in old age as well.
Even with an illness you can still be a great parent, a great spouse, a great student, and a great whatever. You just may have to do it differently than you did before.
Try to surround yourself with supportive people. Find small things that you can enjoy every day. Set realistic short-term goals for yourself. Even small goals such as a visit to a park or museum, or a phone call with a close friend, can help you make the suffering more bearable.
And remember, the illness is not who you are.
I always appreciate the fresh perspective you provide on death and dying. Thank you!
I will show this article to my husband who complains about the littlest of ailments.
When are you going to write about the differences between the male and female’s perspective on suffering???
It should be a book.
Thanks
Stay tuned…..
When we consider our sick self to be our real self, we start equating our illness with our identity. This isn’t inherently bad, but for many people, it can lead to resisting recovery and preparing ourselves for the real work. Been there, done that.
Thanks for sharing.
Blessings and good wishes on you for bringing our minds back to the inevitable every month with your stories.
It appears there are little gems throughout life that we can use to prepare ourselves for the inevitable.
A treasure.
Awesome idea! (Wanted to give this 5 stars but for some reason my phone got stuck on one- tried to delete and start over but it wouldn’t let me do that either.) Love reading your posts. Always an idea worth pondering and sharing. Thank you!